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I was orphaned at the age of 6 when my parents were killed in an IRA firebomb. I spent the ages between 6 and 17 in a childrens home. I graduated from high school at the age of 10 so I've been going to college since then. Finally, at the age of 17 the lawyer in charge of the trust fund my parents left me found a guardian willing to take me in until I was 21 with the option of adopting me. He is a 30-year-old detective with the NYPD named Mike Logan. We get along just fine, very compatible. I am getting my doctorate in psychology, specifically deviant behavior geared towards police work. I had a boyfriend when I moved in with him, a man named Kevin.

Mike and I get along fine. It was made clear from me at the very beginning that I didn't need or want a father, what I wanted was a big brother/friend. That's what Mike became to me.

Kevin travels a lot and we don't get to see each other a lot but we talk on the phone most nights. Now, Mike gets along very well with all my friends but he is very cool and reserved around Kevin. Everyone, who knows Kevin, me included calls him Big D except Mike. To him he is Kevin. At first I thought the age difference between us, he is 35 and I am 18, was the reason for the coolness but soon found out that wasn't the case but for the life of me I couldn't figure out what the reason was. Mike would be his usual funny, sweet, kind, animated self until Kevin would show up then it was like a wall of ice would drop down around him. I didn't think it was that he didn't like Kevin, he told me he liked him just fine. I just couldn't figure it out.

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I am a 'sexy babe', as my make friends put it. I dress sexy and have the attitude to go along with it. In all honesty without make up and in grungy clothes I look all of 13.

Ever since I have moved in I have been able to talk to him about anything at all. We have discussed everything. He is one of the few people in this world I can talk to about my inner most feelings. He is also one of four people who know that for all my sexy body and attitude that I am still a virgin. He has answered every question I have asked him about sex, honestly and discussed it in detail with me. He is always honest with me about everything.

Once in a while after work he has a few drinks. He never becomes nasty or violent just more mellow and funny. I have never felt threatened by him in the way I have around some men that are drunk.

Kevin knows I am a virgin and hasn't pushed the issue of sex with me. That is why I like to go out with older men, they have their libidos under control for the most part and know the meaning of the word NO. We get along fine and enjoy each others' company. We became friends first and really got to know each other before the topic of sex ever came up. The farthest it has ever gone is some really heavy petting and I have jerked him off a couple of times. But the issue is never pressed and have never felt pressured into doing anything we did. It isn't that I didn't have any sexual desires, believe me I do. Most of the time after our dates I have to go home and relieve myself, something I do three or four times a week anyway. I am just scared to 'go all the way'. I have held onto my virginity for so long that the thought of having sex scares me.

One night Mike was propped up on the couch watching a basketball game. I flopped down on the sofa next to him and watched the game for a while. After it was over there wasn't anything else good on so we started talking. He asked me how school was going and what I was doing. We discussed that for a while then went on to discussing some of the cases he was working on.

"Mike, there is something I need to ask you." I said a little nervously. "Does it hurt to have sex the first time?" He smiled at me. "I'm the wrong person to be asking that. I'm a man not a woman. But from my understanding it does hurt but how much depends on the woman a bit and how gentle the man is. Does that answer your question?"

"I think so."

"Is that the reason you've held out for so long, you're afraid it's going to hurt?"

I grinned, sheepishly, "Part of it. The other part is just the fear of the unknown."

He laughed, reaching over and tussling my hair a bit. "There is nothing wrong with that. Males and females both are scared and nervious the first time." He looked at me, "You thinking about losing your virginity?"

I shrugged, "Yes, the hormones are taking over."

He laughed, "That happens at your age. I'm surprised that you have held out as long as you have. Most girls your age have had several partners."

That weekend I had a date with Kevin. We went out and had a good time. A little heavy petting and a hickey was as far it went. He had me home by 2:00 AM. He walked me to the apartment door, gave me a kiss then left. I let myself in and put my jacket in the closet. I then headed to my room. I noticed Mike sitting on the sofa. That was unusual, he never waited up for me when I went out.

I wandered over to the sofa and sat beside him. He looked at me and smiled. "Have a good time?" He turned my head slightly and looked at the hickey. "I think that answers my question."

From the smell of his breath and the way his eyes looked I could tell that he had been drinking and a lot more than usual. To put it bluntly he was bombed. I smiled at him, "Yea, we had fun. Well, I'm going to head to bed." I leaned over, kissed him on the cheek then headed to my bedroom. I undressed, grabbed my nightshirt and a clean pair of panties then went in to take a shower. When I was done I got dressed then went into the bedroom and sat down at my vanity to brush my hair out. I was letting my mind wander and didn't hear the door open. Mike leaned against the doorjamb, folded his arms across his chest, and said, "Was he any good?"

I jumped a little he had startled me. I looked at him, "You scared me, I didn't hear you come in. What do you mean?"

"Just what I said, was he any good." He had a strange look in his eyes.

I looked at him, bewildered. "I still don't know what you mean."

He stood up straight, put his hands in the front pockets of his pants, and looked at me then said, "I mean you obviously fucked him and I was wanting to know if he was any good."

I looked at him, mouth agape. "What is wrong with you? You don't know that we did anything and even if we did it wouldn't be any of your business."

He strolled over to stand by the vanity and looked down at me. "You obviously did something from the mark on your neck. You were just saying the other day that your hormones were kicking into high gear. So I figure with him being almost seven feet tall he has to have a pretty big dick and I was wondering if it hurt and just how big he is."

I stood up and looked at him. "I do not believe this. First, the size of his dick is none of your business. Second, and this is really none of your business, we didn't have sex."

I turned to walk away from him but he grabbed my arm, pushed me flat against the wall, and stood in front of me, pressing up against me. "He isn't what you need, I am." Then he crushed his lips down on mine.

I struggled against him, trying to push him off me. Finally, he pulled his lips off of mine and I was able to shove him away a little bit "What in the hell is wrong with you?"

He looked down at me; "Not a god damned thing." He then crushed his lips back down onto mine, reaching up and starting to fondle my breasts through my shirt.

I will be the first to admit that Mike is a handsome and sexy man. If he weren't my guardian I could go for him. He took his lips off mine and started kissing my neck. With one hand he pushed my shirt up he started stroking my naked breasts. With his other hand he reached up and started running his fingers through my hair. He was turning me on more than I already was from the aftermath of the date. I wanted Mike but I didn't want it with a drunken man. I wanted him sober. I moaned a little then said, "I want you Mike but not now, when you sober up."

That was like a splash of cold water on him. He pulled his hands off me. He looked at my face then down at the floor. "Oh God Mickey, I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me." He put his hands back in his pockets and walked out of my room. I heard the door to his room shut. I sighed then crawled into bed and soon fell into a troubled sleep.



The next morning I woke up and heard Mike moving around in the kitchen. When I came out he was just dishing up breakfast. I gave him the usual good morning kiss and sat down to eat. All through the meal he wouldn't even look at me. He spent most of the day avoiding me. Finally, he was out watching TV and I came out and sat beside him. He mumbled something to me. I grabbed the remote control and shut the TV off. "We need to talk Mike."

He looked down at the floor. "I am so sorry bout last night. I was drunk, I know that was no excuse, and I lost control."

"You wouldn't have done it at all if you weren't already thinking about it before you started drinking."

He sighed, "You're right. I do want you. That is my problem with Kevin."

I smiled, "You're jealous."

"Yes, I'm jealous."

I took ahold of his hand and he looked at me again. "Mickey can you forgive and ever trust me again?"

I smiled at him, "Of course I can. Do you remember what I said to you?"

"Yes." He said, smiling at me. "Mickey, I'm sober now and I'm sorry about the rough way I treated you but I still want you. Did you mean it when you said you wanted me too?"

"Yes but I didn't want you drunk so that you would regret it in the morning. I also wanted a man that was in control of himself."

He leaned over and tenderly kissed me. "I want to get one thing straight before we go and further. You're still a virgin right?"

I reached up and stroked the side of his face, "Yes. I told you that last night. I didn't lie."

He pulled me over onto his lap, wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me into a deep kiss. When he broke it off he stroked my hair and said, "Are you sure about this? If we make love everything will change and we can't go back. I'm willing to take that chance and deal with the consequences. I want to make sure you are. If you have any doubts nothing will happen between us." He reached up and stroked the side of my face. "I want you to be sure."

I laid my head on his shoulder and wrapped my arms around his neck. "I'm sure Mike. I want it to be special and with someone I care about. I can't think of anyone better than you."

He stood up and carried me into his bedroom. He sat me on the edge of the bed. He then stood up and stripped down to his underwear then came back over and kneeled between my legs. He started kissing and stroking my hair. I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck. After a couple of minutes he broke off the kiss and looked into my eyes. "Are you scared?"

I looked at him, "A little bit. I've never even been naked in front of a man before."

He touched the side of my face. "It's alright. I'm nervious too. I don't want to hurt you and I want it to be special." He then kissed me again and started to ease his hands down to the front of my shirt and unbutton it. When he reached the waistband of my jeans he pulled the tail of it out and unbuttoned the last two buttons. He then reached up and eased it off my shoulders, letting it fall to the bed. He then ran his hands across my naked shoulders and down my ribcage.

I shivered a little bit as he touched my naked flesh. He bent down and kissed me again. "You're so beautiful. Just relax I won't hurt you." He then reached down and unbuttoned my jeans and lowered the zipper. He then hooked his fingers in the waistband and started to ease them down my hips. I lay flat on the bed and arched my hips up so he could slide them off. When they were off he dropped them to the floor.

The only things I was left wearing were my bra and panties. He made no move to take them off. He got up onto the bed and lay down beside me, pulling me into his arms, kissing me. He reached down and started to rub up and down my bare stomach and ribs, staying between the boundaries of my bra and panties. He then started kissing don my throat, working his way down to the valley of my cleavage. Then he reached up to the front of my bra and started to unhook it. He then opened it up, exposing my breasts. The eased the straps down my arms and off, tossing it onto the floor. Then, he leaned down and started to lick and suck on my left breast and played with my right one. After a couple minutes he switched. He then shifted position a bit until he was on all fours straddling my body. I reached up and started running my fingers through his thick hair, moaning softly.

Mike then started kissing and licking his way down my stomach until he reached my panties then stopped. He moved up to the head of the bed and lay down. He motioned for me to join him, which I did. He then reached down and grabbed his underwear, arched his hips, and skinned them off. He took my hand and started to move it around on his hairy chest. He smiled at me, "Baby, touch me anywhere you want. Get used to my body." He folded his arms behind his head. I rolled over onto my side and tentatively started to run my hand across his chest. My eyes kept wandering down to his erect cock. Him and Kevin ere the only two named men I had seen. I finally let my hand wander down to his crotch. It shook a little as I ran my fingers through the thick mat of coarse pubic hair. Then I ran it down one of his thickly muscled thighs. I could feel the muscles work underneath the skin. When I reached his knee I moved over to the other leg and did the same thing.

Finally, I moved my hand back to his crotch. I ran the tip of my finger lightly over the head of his cock then down the underside. I let it trace down further over his balls. Mike opened his legs further so I could have easier access to him. I wrapped my hand around his dick and started to move it up and down. I looked up at him, "Is this alright?"

He smiled, then reached over, and stroked my hair. "It's fine."

"Show me how you like it done."

He reached down and wrapped his hand around mine, showing me what he liked. Kinda' wringing the head of it on the upstroke. We kept this up for quite a while until Mikes' breath was coming in short pants. He then pulled both our hands off. He rested for a couple of minutes then propped himself up on elbow and kissed me, "Hmm, we had to quit or I was going to cum." He gently pushed me onto my back. "Now, I'm going to make you feel good." He got up on his knees and pulled my panties down and off. He then spread my legs and lay down between them. He started to run his tongue up and down my slit.

I moaned and arched up. I reached down and ran my fingers through his hair. It felt wonderful. I had never felt anything so good in my life. He soon had me writhing all over the bed and cumming.

While I was recovering Mike crawled up between my legs and propped my thighs on his and bent over me, resting himself on his elbows. He leaned down and kissed me, "Did that feel good baby?"

I smiled, "Hmm, there isn't a word in the English language to describe how good it felt."

He smiled at me, "Do you want to try and have sex?"

"I want to try but I am scared."

He stroked my hair. "Everything will be alright. I will be as gentle as I can and if you want to stop at any time just say so and it will stop. I don't want to hurt you I want to make you feel good."

I looked up into his big brown eyes. "Alright, make love to me Mike."

I could feel him move one of his hands between his legs as he kissed me tenderly. I could then feel the head of his cock rubbing up and down my slit. Finally he rested the head of his cock at the opening of my pussy and started to ease it inside. I winced and tightened up, it hurt.

Mike kissed me again, "Why don't you wrap your arms around my neck. Dig in if you need to. Try to relax, it won't hurt as much if you relax."

I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and did my best to relax as much as I could. Mike inched his way into me as slow and easy as he could. He was trying his damnedest not to hurt me.

It took him a long time to reach my hymen. He laid down almost flat on top of me propped on his forearms. He kissed me tenderly, "This is it Baby. Yell, scream, dig in, anything you feel you need to do. I will be as gentle as I know how to be but I imagine it is going to hurt."

I wrapped my arms tighter around his shoulders, preparing for what was now going to become the inevitable. I was more than a little frightened by it.

Mike kissed me tenderly then started moving in and out slightly. Finally on the in stroke he slammed all the way through the membrane and buried himself all the way inside me. I dug my nails into his shoulders and screamed a little bit as the membrane ripped and I felt the tears fill my eyes and spill over to run down my cheeks. Everything I had heard was true, it hurt like a son of a bitch. Mike pulled me tight to him, kissing me and stroking my hair. "It's all over baby. You won't have to go through that again. Now we can work on it feeling good." He held still for a long time, letting me get used to him and letting the pain ease up. When I was finally used to him and the pain dulled he slowly started to move in and out. After several minute the pain started to give way to feeling very good. After several more minutes I started to urge him to go faster. He got back to the upright position, on his knees, pulling me closer to him and started moving in and out faster and harder. I could see the sweat running off of him.

He then reached down and started to rub my clit in small circles. That soon had me writhing on the bed, moaning and begging him for more. He continued rubbing me until I came, hard, screaming at the top of my lungs.

He leaned back over and kissed me then started moving faster and faster. He arched his back and groaned then pulled out of me and shot his load all over my stomach. He collapsed on top of me, panting. He kissed the side of my face and stroked my hair.

"Mickey, that was so good. Did it feel good to you?"

I reached up and ran my fingers through his hair, "It was wonderful."

He rolled off me onto his side and pulled me close to him. I could see blood all over his cock. "I know it hurt but I was as gentle as I knew how to be. You're the last person in the world that I want to hurt."

I smiled at him and kissed him softly, "Once I got over the pain it felt wonderful."

He kissed me back. "Just lay there. I'll be right back." He went to the bathroom returning with a washcloth and cleaned the blood off me.

- The End -

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